with Relationship Speaker/Author/Coach...
Larry James
Blended Family Ceremony
Most often we think of marriage as the joining of two people to be wife and husband. In reality, marriage
is often much more than that. It is also the coming together and merging of family and friends. When the
bride and/or groom have children, it is appropriate for the children to be included in the wedding ceremony.
With children present, the wedding ceremony also becomes the proclamation of a new family or a "family wedding."
Generally speaking, children will accept a parent's remarriage more readily when they feel included in
the wedding plans, the wedding ceremony and are given a tangible symbol of being embraced by a new family;
perhaps a beautiful bracelet, a gold-banded birthstone ring or some other significant token of love.
Blended families are often referred to as step-families or co-families. This ceremony can easily be
incorporated into the wedding ceremony.
Pouring different colored sands together is another way to symbolize the joining of the bride and groom and their family together.
See the Blending of the Sands Ceremony.
• • •
Blended Family Ceremony #1
Officiant Remarks: It is the desire of _________ and _________ to extend their commitments to each other
by making some promises to the children of this family. As you all join hands to form a new circle of love, we will seal
this union with spoken promises like the rings this bride and groom have exchanged.
Officiant to the Bride/Groom: Do you _________ and _________, promise to be faithful, loving, tender
and nurturing parents, always there for _________ (child/children's name), not only providing their/her/his
physical needs, but their/her/his emotional needs as well, always a good listener, a loving counselor and a friend?
Bride & Groom: We do.
Officiant to the Mother/Father (Speaking to the Child/Children): (Repeat after me). _________, I want you
to know that I love your mother/father very much. I will not and cannot replace a mother/father loved by you, however
I can promise you that I will love you and care for you as if you were my own. I promise to be a committed listener. I promise
you my trust, to be fair, my support, what knowledge I can share, to be your friend, and to provide a shoulder to cry on.
I promise to be available to you as I am to your mother/father.
Bride/Groom to Child/Children: _________, I give you this _________ (gift) as a sign of my loving promises
made this day.
Officiant to Child/Children: Do you accept the promises made by _________?
Child/Children: I do or We do.
Officiant: May a kind God now bless you all as family, and bless this marriage and this home,
wherever you may be. And so it is.
• • •
Blended Family Ceremony #2
Officiant: There are children who will share in this marriage.
The gathering of this new family will have a deep influence upon them. It will both complicate and enrich
their lives. They will also have much to contribute to this new family. We realize that in order for
the home to be a happy one, it is essential that there be love and understanding between the children
and the adults being married.
Officiant to Bride and Groom: Is your love for each other broad enough to include _________ (name the child/children)
and deep enough to honor their/her/his presence in this marriage and to pledge yourselves to love and care for them/her/him?
Bride and Groom: We will.
Officiant to Child/Children: You are a vital part of this new marriage. _________ and
_________ give you their unconditional love and honor your presence in their lives. _________, you
will have a share in this union, for your life/lives will be touched by the covenant being made here
today. Your participation is requested to help develop the bonds of a new family.
As _________ and _________ have exchanged their pledges in holy union, we ask from you also a pledge, that you will
join together to weave a fabric of mutual help and comfort, of challenge and support, and that you
will help create a home and a way of life in which all of you may grow into the fullness of the best
people you can be. Will you now pledge to do your best to help make a happy and successful home
for all of you by your love and cooperation?"
Child/Children: I will or We will.
Officiant: And so it is.
• • •
For more information on "blended families," click here and National Stepfamily Day, click
here.
Read:
"When Stepfamily Reality Sets In"
by Kelly Kirkendoll Shafer, guest author.
Read:
"Blended Family Holidays" -
After divorce or remarriage, many things change, including seasonal celebrations. Experts agree that minimizing
holiday stress is one of the greatest gifts parents can give their kids - here's how.
Read:
"Surviving the Blended Family Holiday"
by Dawn Miller, guest author.
Read:
"Holiday Survival Handbook" -
Follow the links to read the entire handbook.
For mare Articles about Blended Families and the Holidays, click
here.
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