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Celebrate Intimate commitments

 

with Relationship Speaker/Author/Coach...
Larry James


Commitment Ceremony

NOTE:  Larry's "romantic" ceremony has gained in popularity and gets rave reviews! It's an "Award Winning" romantic commitment ceremony. Word gets around fast when something is good. If you have the slightest interest in having Larry James perform your ceremony, you are encouraged to call to check availability. He usually books 5 to 6 months in advance, with a few open dates in between. Weekday commitments are generally easier to schedule on shorter notice.

NOTE:  This ceremony has a touch of traditional with a few modern twists, a slight Spiritual tint (or not!) and an emphasis on lots of love and romance! Anything goes!

Sometimes there are legal reasons why a couple cannot be married. This Commitment Ceremony has been designed for couples who are committed to each other but cannot be legally married. People who truly love each other should be permitted to legally marry! Ring for a commitment ceremony or LGBT

If you do not belong to a church, synagogue or other religious organization, or if your family minister is not available for your commitment date, or is unwilling to travel to their commitment location call Larry James. He will do everything he can to make sure your own personal beliefs are represented in your commitment ceremomy.

Without any of the add-on ceremonies, such as the Blending of the Sands, or Unity Candle, etc., the normal length of the ceremony is usually about 20 to 22 minutes. Generally speaking - even with add-on ceremonies - the ceremony will be less than 30 minutes.

Although it is one of our most popular ceremonies, we use it only as a template for custom designing your commitment ceremony! It is always customized to fit your specific needs. It's "your" day and you get to say what is in your ceremony!

Note: There are only one thing that Larry James will not say in his commitment ceremony. "Honor and obey, till death do us part." Instead he will say, "Honor and respect. I say these words because I love you and choose to life the rest of my life with you.  -  Larry James

When the partner #1 appears, ready to walk down the aisle. . .

Minister: Ladies and Gentlemen, please rise.

Presentation of the Partner #1

Minister: Who supports this woman/man in her commitment to this man/women?

The Father/Mother: Her mother and I . . . OR . . . Our family does . . . OR . . . I do.

Minister to the Guests: Who stands with this couple to express the good wishes of their families and friends? And everyone says, "We do!" Together. . .

Guests: "We do!"

Minister: You may be seated.

(Optional) - A nice way to honor close relatives who have passed on or others who were not able to attend your commitment.

Minister: Join with me as we bow our heads to observe a moment of silence to honor the memory of those who are not with us today, but are here in spirit. (Pause briefly) Amen.

Minister's Welcome and Opening Remarks

Welcome, one and all. How beautiful is the day that is touched by love! May this be a moment to be remembered and cherished.

Having a commitment to each other is a very special spiritual connection of two people united for a common purpose, bringing love and trust together into single focus. We have come together in the presence of God (Love) to witness and bless the joining of this man and this woman. The bond and covenant of marriage was established by God in creation, and our Lord Jesus Christ adorned this manner of life by his presence and first miracle at a wedding in Cana of Galilee.

It signifies to us the mystery of the union between Christ and his Church, and Holy Scripture commends it to be honored among all who are gathered here.

The union of heart, body, and mind is intended by God for their mutual joy; for the help and comfort given one another in prosperity and adversity; and their nurture in the knowledge and love of God. Therefore this commitment is not to be entered into lightly, but reverently, deliberately, and in accordance with the purposes for which it was intended.

Into this union _________ and _________ now come to be joined. If any of you can show just cause why they may not lawfully be joined together, speak now; or forever hold your peace.

Relationship Thoughts from the Minister

Sooner or later we begin to understand that love is more than verses on valentines and romance in movies.

We begin to know that love is here and now, real and true, the most important thing in our lives. For love is the creator of our favorite memories and the foundation of our fondest dreams.

Without love, we merely exist. With love, we truly begin to live!

For love is a promise that is always kept, a fortune that can never be spent, a seed that can flourish in even the most unlikely place. And this radiance that never fades, this mysterious and magical joy is the greatest treasure of all - one known only by those who truly love.

We are together as friends, relatives and family to mark the end of one beginning and to recognize officially a new beginning which for _________ and _________ serves as a public affirmation of their friendship and their love.

Someone once said: The most wonderful of all things in life, is the discovery of another human being with whom one's relationship has a growing depth, beauty and joy as the years increase.

This inner progressiveness of love between two human beings is a most marvelous thing; it cannot be found by looking for it or by passionately wishing for it. It's a Divine destiny."

They want this day to mean something special to you as guests. Those who are committed to each other may want to silently renew and reaffirm your vows today by gently taking the hand of your partner during this ceremony. Others may want to also join hands and think about what it means to be a friend, for commitment is built first on friendship.

There are no ties on earth so sweet, none so tender as those you are about to assume. There are no vows so solemn as those you are about to make. There is no institution of earth so sacred as that of the union you will form, for the true home is not only the place in which you will live, but is also the dwelling place where each lives in the heart and mind of the other.

Charge to the Couple

_________ and _________, true marriage is the holiest of all earthly unions. It is to be entered into reverently, consciously and with full understanding of its significance.

To be complete, marriage must be spiritual as well as an earthly estate. When it is Spiritual in thought, purpose, plan and action, it becomes the harmonious, peaceful and happy union for man and woman.

Commitment only works when it is based upon a deep, inner communion of two souls who find completion, each in the other.

Today, your separate lives, each with your individual memories, desires and hopes, merge into one life - a new dimension.

Happiness is not something that just happens. A great partnership must be created. In the art of commitment the little things are the big things.

  • It is never being too old to hold hands.
  • It is remembering to say, I love you" (out loud), at least once a day.
  • It is never going to sleep angry.
  • It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family.
  • It is at no time taking the other for granted. . . for what you take for granted, disappears.
  • It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in a spirit of joy.
  • It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
  • It is having the capacity to forgive and not bring it up later.
  • It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.
  • It is a common search for the good and the beautiful in each other.
  • It is not expecting each other to wear a halo or to have the wings of an angel.
  • It is not looking for perfection in each other. It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding and a sense of humor.
  • It is not only committing to the right partner, it is BEING the right partner.

This commitment can be a great adventure when it is the outward expression of a great love; such a love is characterized by compassion, passion and courage.

It allows you to see through to your partner's essence, willing to be in total support of your partner's well-being, goals, purpose and spirit; and unwilling for your partner to be less than all he or she can be spiritually, mentally, and physically.

Such a love requires that you be totally honest with yourself and your mate, that you ask for what you want, take action even though you are afraid, share your feelings and listen but leave your partner free to be who they really are. In other words, always love your partner for who they are, not for who you think they should be.

Always remember, "Relationships are something that must be worked on all the time, not only when they are broken and need to be fixed. Never stop doing the things that brought you together in the first place."

We as your friends gathered here today, accept for you a love that brings out your magnificence, a love that gives you the courage to stand apart and the willingness to stand together. When times call for you to be apart, may you always return to your togetherness in the same spirit of love that you are feeling in this moment.

Most of all, we want that, at the end of your lives on this planet, you will look into each others eyes and be able to say:

"Because you have loved me, you have given me a faith in myself, and because I have faith in myself, I have loved my fellow man. My life with you has been complete."

•    •    •

(Optional) - commitment Readings (Scriptural or Otherwise)/Music/Poetry by friends or family - Note: You may want to have a friend read the lyrics to your special song.

•    •    •

Declaration of Consent

Minister: _________ and _________, will you release the past, bringing only those memories, desires and hopes which will belong to each other, into your future life together?

Both: We will.

Minister: Please face each other, holding hands.

(Both partners face each other and holds hands. If there is a bouquet, hand the bouquet to the minister who will lay it on a table until after the ceremony.)

•    •    •

(Optional) - Partners Read Personal Promises to Each Other - (NOTE: This can be a very special part of your commitment ceremony. Larry highly recommends that you select this option. Always write what you are going to say on an index card. It is a good idea not to tell your partner what you will be saying. Let it be a nice surprise. They can be humorous or humorous mixed with some serious promises. Your choice. Ask Larry James for a few samples of humorous personal promises.)

Minister: At this time _________ and _________ would like to make some personal promises to each other.

Partner #1:

Partner #2

NOTE: For ideas and assistance in writing your own personal promises (vows), ask Larry James. You may want to consider writing something together and have Larry James either read them for you or read a few words at a time as you repeat a few words at a time to each other.) For ideas and assistance in writing your own promises (vows), ask Larry James or click here.

•    •    •

Minister to Partner: _________ do you reach out in love to receive _________ and choose to share your life with her/him? Will you promise always to give to her/him your expression of your ever growing love, will you comfort her/him, be sensitive to her/him needs, express your feelings with her/him, listen to her/him, put your trust in her/him, and forsaking all others, be her/him intimate friend and honor her/him as your equal partner?

Groom: "I do" . . . OR . . . "I will"

Minister to 2nd Partner: _________ do you reach out in love to receive _________ and choose to share your life with him/her? Will you promise always to give to him/her your expression of your ever growing love, will you comfort him/her, be sensitive to him/her needs, express your feelings with him/her, listen to him/her, put your trust in him/her, and forsaking all others, be him/her intimate friend and honor him/her as your equal partner?

Bride: "I do" . . . OR . . . "I will"

Minister: Please repeat after me.

(Both partners say the following at the same time to each other)

I give you my love
my heart
my hope
my joy
these I offer you freely.

To delight in your soul
to nourish your mind.

To celebrate love with you
to share my joy
to console you in sorrow
I choose to go with you always.

I promise to listen to you
to express my innermost feelings
to labor with you
to believe in you
even when you doubt yourself
to be the mirror of your highest value
and to hold myself beside you
for the rest of our days.

Photo by www.TiffanyPhotos.com
Chris Jalovec commitment
"I say these words because I love you, and choose to live the rest of my life with you. This is my solemn vow."
The Chris Jalovec commitment

Exchange of Vows

Minister to Partner: _________, please repeat after me.

In the name of God (or Love), I _________, choose you, _________, to be my life-partner, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to honor and respect, to love and to cherish. I say these words because I love you, and choose to live the rest of my life with you. This is my solemn vow.

Minister to 2nd Partner: _________, please repeat after me.

In the name of God (or Love), I _________, choose you, _________, to be my life-partner, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to honor and respect, to love and to cherish. I say these words because I love you, and choose to live the rest of my life with you. This is my solemn vow.

Minister: These spoken commitments to each other are the alignment of your words, which speaks boldly of your intentions. . . and your actions, which speak louder than your words.

(Optional) - Some couples ask Larry to add a brief prayer at this time.

Minister: What symbols do you give in this marriage?

Both Partners: Rings.

(Ring bearer(s) gives rings to the Minister)

Your rings are circles and a circle is the symbol of the sun, the earth, the universe, of wholeness, perfection, peace and unity. Like circles, your rings have no beginning and no end and in the sacred tradition of commitment rings have come to symbolize eternal love and the endless union of body, of mind, and spirit.

These rings will be worn by _________ and _________ to show to the world their love and commitment to one another. May the presence of these rings always remind you of the eternal love you have pledged and devotion you willingly share with one another from this moment on.

Let each of us in his own way, may it be prayer, may it be by a thought, whatever you and I would wish for this couple, let's pray or have our own thoughts as a blessing upon these rings. Let us pause at this time for these silent blessings. (pause) These rings, now blessed are a symbol of love and faithfulness. They seal the vows of marriage and represent a promise of forever love.

Minister to Partner: _________, please repeat after me.

I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow, and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you, in the Name of the Father, and the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.

You may now place the ring on her/his finger.

Minister to 2nd Partner: _________, please repeat after me.

I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow, and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you, in the Name of the Father, and the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.

You may now place the ring on his/her finger.

•    •    •

(Optional)  The Blended Family Ceremony or. . .

(Optional)  The Blending of the Sands Ceremony with children - Most popular of the 2 choices.

•    •    •

Pronouncement of Commitment

Now that _________ and _________ have given themselves to each other by solemn vows, with the joining of hands and the giving and receiving of a ring, I now pronounce you partners for life, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.

Those whom God (Love) has joined together, let no one put asunder.

•    •    •

The Signing of the Commitment Certificate (not a requirement - See Larry James for details.

(Optional)  Have your Guests witness the signing of the Commitment Certificate during the ceremony).

Minister: At this time _________ and _________ would like for you to witness the signing of the Commitment Certificate. The witnesses, _________ and _________ (Choose two witnesses) will join us now to make this part of the ceremony official.

NOTE:  Although the signing of the Commitment Certificate is often done after the ceremony, this is a great way to allow the guests to see a part of the ceremony they rarely have the occasion to witness. It can also be signed at the reception.

•    •    •

(Optional)  The Unity Candle Ceremony - Not recommended for outdoor commitments.

(Optional)  The Blending of the Sands Ceremony - Bride & Groom only

(Optional)  Rose Ceremony

(For more options, click:  here)

•    •    •

Minister:  You may now seal your promises with a kiss.  .

Introduction of Couple

Minister: Ladies and Gentlemen: It is my pleasure to introduce to you, _________ and _________ _________. OR. . .

Ladies and Gentlemen, it is my pleasure to introduce to you, _________ (first & last name of partner #1) and _________ (first & last name of partner #2), partners for life!

Now go in peace and forever Celebrate Love!

•    •    •

NOTE:  If there will be no receving line immediately after the ceremony and both partners will be busy taking pictures, often I will be asked to make the following announcement:

(Optional)  Reception Announcement, if no receiving line

Minister: Ladies and Gentlemen, _________ and _________ request that you offer your congratulations at the reception so that pictures of the commitment party can stay on schedule.

In the meantime, please help yourself to hor d'ourves and something cold to drink. Please allow the parents to go before me. Let the celebration begin!

•    •    •

NOTE: Watch two short videos of Larry James in action during one of his "romantic" wedding ceremonies. Click here!

Commitment Cartoon

•    •    •

Copyright © - Larry James. All rights reserved. Under special circumstances, license to perform this or any part of this ceremony by another minister/officiant at your commitment may be granted. For full details, call Larry James: 480-998-9411 (Greater Phoenix area) or 800-725-9223 toll-free.

A special "Thank you" to Wilferd Arlan Peterson (August 21, 1900 - June 2, 1995) who wrote a few lines in this ceremony that were given to me by a bride. Although some of the words were changed to better fit my style, I am grateful for Wilferd's contribution to my work. - Larry James

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