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with Relationship Speaker/Author/Coach...
Larry James


Rose Ceremony
A rose!

In the Rose Ceremony, the Bride and Groom give each other a red rose bud. Two red rose buds are all that is necessary. If you have children involved in the ceremony, you may have a rose for each of them too. The Rose Ceremony is placed near the end of the ceremony just "after" being pronounced husband and wife.

This ceremony is what I call an "add-on" ceremony. It is intended to be added into the wedding or renewal of vows ceremony.

In the old language of flowers, a single red rose has always meant "I love you". The Rose ceremony gives recognition to the new and most honorable title of "Wife and Husband".

This ceremony originates in a classic rose ceremony from a lost and elegant age. It was rewritten by the Hon. Mark Ovard and rewritten again by Larry James explaining the true meaning of the ceremony - and in ways that can endure through your married life together - this is a unique and meaningful addition to any marriage ceremony. It will also inspire your guests.

Hot Idea: Here is Larry's new twist to this ceremony. As the couple exits the alter area some will often walk to their mothers and present the rose buds to them immediately following the ceremony. The groom hands the mother of the bride his rose, and the bride hands her rose bud to the groom's mother, whispering "I love you," or "I'm happy to be a part of the family," (perhaps a brief hug would be nice) before proceeding with their exit - knowing that love is not love until you give it away! This is a nice way of involving the mothers in the ceremony. Chose to not tell the mothers if you will be doing this - let it be a surprise. Be sure to tell the photographer. You will want to capture this special moment.

•    •    •

Rose Ceremony - Short Version

Minister: Your first gift to each other for your wedding today has been your wedding rings - which shall always be an outward demonstration of your vows of love and respect and a public showing of your commitment to each other. In addition, you both have given and received one of the most valuable and precious gifts of life - one I hope you always remember - the gift of true and abiding love within the devotion of marriage.

You now have what remains the most honorable title that exists between a woman and a man - the title of "wife" and "husband." It is now my great privilege to be the first to address you as wife and husband and for your first gift as wife and husband, that gift will be a single red rose bud.

(Minister hands each a red rose bud)

The rose is considered a symbol of love and a single rose always means only one thing - it means, "I love you." So it is appropriate that for your first gift - as wife and husband - that gift would be a single rose bud.
A rose!

Please exchange the rose buds as your first gift to each other as wife and husband.

Within these rose buds, if given proper loving care, is the potential for an even more beautiful expression of Life and Love in the form of the mature flower. And so it is with your marriage. At this point your marriage is like these rose buds - ready, with proper loving care - to unfold into a very beautiful expression of life.

____________ and ____________, if there is anything you remember of this marriage ceremony, it is that it was love that brought you here today, it is only love which can make it a glorious union, and it is by love which your marriage shall endure. Whatever the situation, love, understanding, acceptance and forgiveness can make everything right.

NOTE: Some couples will give their "I love you" rose buds to the mothers as they walk out. For example, the groom would give his rose bud to his new mother-in-law and the bride would give her rose to her new mother-in-law and say something like, "I'm happy to be a part of the family, etc." It works best if the giving of the rose buds to the mothers is a surprise.

Rose Ceremony - Long Version

Minister: Your first gift to each other for your wedding today has been your wedding rings - which shall always be an outward demonstration of your vows of love and respect and a public showing of your commitment to each other. In addition, you both have given and received one of the most valuable and precious gifts of life - one I hope you always remember - the gift of true and abiding love within the devotion of marriage.

You now have what remains the most honorable title that exists between a woman and a man - the title of "wife" and "husband." It is now my great privilege to be the first to address you as such and for your first gift as wife and husband, that gift will be a single red rose bud.

(Minister hands each a red rose bud)

The rose is considered a symbol of love and a single rose always means only one thing - it means, "I love you." So it is appropriate that for your first gift that gift would be a single rose bud.

Please exchange the rose buds as your first gift to each other as wife and husband.

Within these rose buds, if given proper loving care, is the potential for an even more beautiful expression of Life and Love in the form of the mature flower. And so it is with your marriage. At this point your marriage is like these rose buds - ready, with proper loving care - to unfold into a very beautiful expression of life.
A rose!

____________ and ____________, I would ask that where ever you make your home in the future - whether it be a large and elegant home - or a small and graceful one - that you both select one very special location for roses; so that on each anniversary of this truly wonderful occasion you both may take a rose to that spot both as a recommitment to the holy vows which you have made before God and those present on this beautiful day.

Those of us who are already married know that marriage, like life, brings with it many joys and also many challenges. We also know that love, while beautiful, does not always show its prettiest face. There are days when we may find it hard to express the depth of our love for one another.

Sometimes it is difficult to find the right words. It might be difficult to find the words to say "I am sorry" or "I forgive you"; "I need you" or "I am hurting". If this should happen, if you simply can not find these words, leave a rose at that spot which both of you have selected - for that rose then says what matters most of all and should overpower all other things and all other words.

That rose says, "I still love you."

It is wise to understand this as a statement of love and the need, or request for that extra bit of tender loving care permits the beauty of the rose to come forth from the rose bud. So also will that love permit the beauty of maturity to come forth from your marriage in every situation. Your partner should accept this rose for the words which cannot be found, and remember the love and hope that you both share today.

____________ and ____________, if there is anything you remember of this marriage ceremony, it is that it was love that brought you here today, it is only love which can make it a glorious union, and it is by love which your marriage shall endure. Whatever the situation, love, understanding, acceptance and forgiveness can make everything right.

a single red rose a single red rose

NOTE: Red roses can also be used as simply a way for the Bride to recognize her mother and the mother of the Groom during the wedding ceremony. This rose honorarium is not to be confused with "The Rose Ceremony" above. For information and the actual words to honor the mothers, click here.

Wendy Burton-Henderson wrote a nice note to her family and friends after her wedding. Click here.



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